Realis 09: Conference on Clouded Dokine 01 Transcriber: logan Opening Narration 1 Introduction [0:02:31] 2 Rejoining the Circus [00:09:25] 7 Candide Meets the Jewel [00:26:54] 19 Donnie is Listless [00:37:59] 24 Landing at the Dokine Ship Spa [00:54:52] 37 Donnie Hits the Books [1:11:22] 45 Wellaway and Mother Hen Hye [1:32:02] 56 Wellaway Signs In [1:50:54] 70 Opening Narration [“Realis” by Jack de Quidt begins playing] Austin: The Serene Atoll is now lit only by the fires spreading through its collapsing superstructure. The radiant blue of Realis itself blotted out by the chitinous holes of the Imperial Empest’s cadaverous Grand Vessels, brought here by a fluke of fate, some surprise of syzygy, or perhaps some augurous echo of an event yet spied. Where to now, Nerveless Chancers? Another flight, another moon, another step in a journey towards… Oh. You would like to know, wouldn’t you? I sense impatience among the listeners. Questions. Questions emerging on lips and in eyes, though I need not read either to know them. Here, here listen to yourselves, oh, is our tour limited to these four moons of the full thousand? What strings draw up from puppet’s back and lead to which hands? Have we beheld the list entire of dramatis personae? What act is this? What scene? What scene are we in? Do not come unglued, listeners. Do not give in to that base urge, the aimless yearning for knowledge. Patience. Patience, now, lest you come to regret your eagerness as so many before who have come undone by the awl of curiosity, have learned to. Apathy is asinine and passion powerful, yes, but desire is always dangerous. Ask any who have ventured into the Drift, realm of psychic hunger, of emotion before emotion, or better, ask those who have had the Drift, aetheric land of unlatched longing, world of wish and want, venture into them. So settle, and hear now of the troupe’s arrival onto Dokine, where city-states flutter on vast wings and where truth is lost in mists of gold. [music ends] Introduction [0:02:31] Austin: Welcome to Friends at the Table, an actual play podcast focused on critical worldbuilding, smart characterization, and fun interactions between good friends. I’m Austin Walker, and today I’m joined by Ali Acampora. Ali: Um, hi! My name is Ali, you’re listening to me on friendsatthetable.cash, thank you very much for that. Austin: That’s true. Ali: Also, check out the Twitch channel. By the time that you’re hearing this, I will have been playing about a half a year’s worth of Fields of Mistria over on Mondays. Keith: In universe. In-game year. Ali: Yes. In-game year. Yes. Austin: I mean, it might be in-real-life year too, by the time they get to this episode. Ali: Y’know, who knows? Keith: Sure. Y’know, yeah. Ali: Y’know, this is true. We’re a little bit into this. We’ve been doing Mistria Mondays, it’s been fun. Check it out on the YouTube, or go -- Austin: Can you tease - can you tell people who your favorite is, so that people who, at home, have their own feelings, can be compelled to come… Ali: [laughs] I am, I am not, I am typically, it seems I am in line with the audience here, I am a March person. Nobody’s shocked by this. [giggles] Um, it’s going well… Austin: Okay. Art: [laughs] I don’t even know what you’re talking about, but you’re like, ‘no one’s shocked by this.’ It’s like, wow, okay. Okay. Austin: The deep self-own. Let’s see, March, Mistria… Art: I guess no one’s shocked by this. Keith: March is, uh, mean to you. Austin: Oh yeah, yeah yeah yeah. I remember this guy. Art: Oh, yeah. Ali: He’s not… yeah. Austin: He’s holding his head up — his default look is looking down his nose at you. [Ali laughs] Keith: Yeah, he’s disdainful. Austin: Yeah. That’s his regular default posture. Ali: It’s going fine. Austin: How’s his back problems that he’s developing by holding his head like this all the time? [Ali and Keith laugh] Does he just have like, a regular spine doctor he sees? And he’s a blacksmith? He needs to not do this. Ali: He gave me a gift recently. So. Austin: Oh! What was it? Ali: It was a, um, a bronze farming hoe. We had like a heart-to-heart where he was like, farming is so easy and I don’t know why everybody likes you! And then he was like, you better do a good job. [laughing] And gave me a tool! And it was really, it was charged. Austin: That is charged. Congratulations on the new farming hoe. Also joining us, Keith J. Carberry. Keith: Uh, hi, my name’s Keith Carberry, you can find me on Twitter and Bluesky at KeithJCarberry, you can find the let’s plays that I do at youtube.com/runbutton. By the time this is up, we’ll have been uploading our Let’s Play 20 Years of Sonic remake let’s play, where we’re remaking our — the only thing that sells anymore is remakes and remasters, so that’s what we’re doing. We’re remaking and remastering it, [Ali: Wowww.] and I think we’re also maybe gonna be doing Silent Hill 2 remastered, where we are playing both the original and the updated version of SIlent Hill together and potentially also doing a let’s watch of our original Silent Hill 2 let’s play to release alongside that. Um, that’s art as far as I’m concerned. Austin: Incredible. Uh, well — Keith: That’s youtube.com/runbutton, did I say that? [Ali laughs] Austin: You didn’t, you said that’s art, which is confusing to me because I was about to introduce Art Martinez-Tebbel. Art: Hey, um, you can find me on Twitter I guess. Friendsatthetable.shop, we got merch. We got merch, newish merch, I don’t know when you’re gonna be hearing this, maybe it’s older merch. I mean, it’s definitely gonna be older than it is now. But it’s still new. Austin: I think by the time they hear this, we might be thinking about new, different merch. Art: Well then, that’s exciting! Keep your eye on friendsatthetable.shop. Yeah. Keith: Yeah. Austin: Yeah. Art: I had to explain what Megalopolis was to Jess right before we recorded this, and I think my brain is still kinda like, fuzzy from that. Ali: Wow. Austin: Like as a film? Art: Yeah like, what it is — Keith: What is that, like a giant monster movie about a big rabbit? Austin: Keith. Ali: Sort of. Art: Yeah. Austin: I guess so. I still haven’t seen it. Keith: Yeah me neither. Art: I might never see it. Austin: I’m gonna see it, y’know… Ali: I saw it, it was crazy. Austin: I shoulda fuckin’ gone with you to see it, god dammit. Art: I don’t have like, a lot of theater time. Ali: [wheezing] Sorry… Austin: No you have a baby. Art: Yeah. Austin: The baby is like the movie theater for you. The way a bird sees a cat inside of a building. Ali: True! Keith: Yeah. Yep, that’s your Netflix. Austin: The baby is your Netflix. Art: Yeah. Austin: So. Art: Very little narrative in that baby, though. Keith: Whenever I see a parent taking care of a child, I say they’re watching TV. Austin: Yeah. I go hey! Knock it off, aren’t you supposed to be taking care of a kid? [Keith and Ali laugh] Stop watchin’ TV! Keith: Stop watchin’ TV! Yeah that’s right, we’re mixing our own metaphors! Austin: That’s right! Today, we are continuing our game of Realis, which prizes passivity except after wisdom gained, recognizes friendship’s strength but rewards solitary achievement, shifts in scope and scale according to needs of the story and the whims of its tellers, and demands honesty and consequences, but care at the table. You will note, I kind of, um, moved some NPCs around in your Kaleidoscope sheet thing, to try to be a little more like, hey, where would that person be? So I added a Circus NPCs tab, that has like, Candide is there, and Curtis Krinsky is there, and Paige Oblivia is there, and Poul the Whittler is there. And there’s a recent NPCs tab that has like, the Orphan Vessel Jubilant Jewel, and Relia Senti and Entire Carousel, the two Tasker’s Menagerie people who y’all were dealing with last session. And then there’s still the Ulled NPCs list, and there’s a blank NPCs list that can kind of like, keep duplicating and clearing so that we can keep it going. And presumably we’ll end up with one that will be a Dokine NPCs list so that if we want to keep track of those particular ones there, we can do that also if that’s where we end up going. Because, when we last left y’all off, it was not on the Golden Moon of Dokine, it was in fact above it. Let’s see here… the Orphan Vessel, Jubilant Jewel, rests neatly in the far shadow of that golden orb of Dokine. Its armor plating loosened and lightly scorched, its orbiting posture tired but free, it hangs not so far from a more familiar vehicle, the trainlike shuttle of Those Nerveless Chancers, the Krinsky Family Circus and Travelling Curiosity. In fact — Keith: When you said ‘that golden orb’ I really thought you were gonna go into a long Nerveless Chancers-style title for Dokine. Rejoining the Circus [00:09:25] Austin: No it’s just called Dokine. [Ali chuckles] Well, it doesn’t have a — I guess it’s just called Dokine. It’s just called Dokine, you’re right. I guess, Dokine Itself though is kind of a fun, whatever, weird name. In any case, the two ships grow close and soon a port extends, reconnected those who had been separated by the arrival of that which hangs in the distance, on the other side of the golden jewel-like marble of Dokine. Far away, yet so massive that even here, even wounded from its encounter with an untimely comet, its crackling chitinous form intimidates any who look towards it. It is Cast Thy Eyes, the corrupted Grand Vessel, flagship of Queen-Commander Xolica of the Imperial Empest, a power that ought not be here, yet is. It’s easier to instead look inward towards the train, where Poul the Whittler, and Paige Oblivia, and Kenneth the Guy With The Meats, and your boss, Curtis Krinsky, are there to welcome you. Krinsky opening his arms as you appear on the other side of this extended walkway, even though I think he probably bears a look of confusion on his face. And just kind of to jump right in, is just like, Austin (as Curtis): Are you all okay? [pause] Keith (as Wellaway): Yeah. Ali (as Hye): We made it out safely. Austin (as Curtis): Yeah, okay. Keith (as Wellaway): How are you? Austin (as Curtis): We all made it. Come on in, or — did you buy a Vessel? Keith (as Wellaway): …Buy. Ali (as Hye): We… Keith (as Wellaway): Have. Ali (as Hye): …reached an understanding with the intelligence on the — Ali: [mumbling] Why’d I say intelligence? I dunno. Austin: Eh. Keith: Yeah! Ali (as Hye): — with the intelligence that — Keith (as Wellaway): With the ship. Ali (as Hye): Yeah, that mans it. Austin (as Curtis): Huh. So what are its rates like? Ali (as Hye): Oh — Keith (as Wellaway): I guess we haven’t reached that much of an agreement. Austin (as Curtis): Can it do any tricks? [Art chuckles] Like, what are we talkin’? How quick can we get it into the act? And what type of act does it do? Does it know jokes? Is it — Wellaway, is it like a clown ship? Keith (as Wellaway): Um, no. It’s not a clown ship. I checked for all relevant clown parts and it doesn’t have any. [Ali chuckles] Austin (as Curtis): Damn! Keith (as Wellaway): I think it might just be more like, a ship. Ali (as Hye): Yeah, the arrangement seems temporary at the moment. Austin (as Curtis): Ah… Ali (as Hye): And it’s a transportation device. Austin (as Curtis): I know what a Vessel is… Keith (as Wellaway): Well you asked if it was a clown. [Ali chuckles] Austin (as Curtis): Well some of ‘em are clowns! Is my understanding. There’s at least one out there that’s a clown. Keith (as Wellaway): Some of the Orphan Vessels are clowns? There’s a clown Orphan Vessel? Austin (as Curtis): There’s gotta be at least one. Ali (as Hye): Perhaps — Keith (as Wellaway): Yeah. So there was one, and now there’s gotta be one. Austin (as Curtis): If there’s one, there’s gotta be one. Ali (as Hye): Perhaps we — Art (as Donnie): That’s just true. Ali (as Hye): We — Keith (as Wellaway): Yeah, that checks out. Ali (as Hye): [laughs] — We could perform for it, in some way, and it could develop an interest, and involve itself then? But I make no promises. Austin (as Curtis): [sigh] Alright, well, in any case, you just made it back in time for stew. Get rested up — Keith (as Wellaway): Oh, Stew’s here? Austin (as Curtis): Oy. Sick of this clown. [Keith laughs] Ali (as Hye): Is this perhaps why you were looking for a replacement clown? [Austin, Keith, Art laugh] Austin (as Curtis): I’m just open to opportunities. In my heart. Austin: And I think, y’know, goes about the rest of the ship and, uh, his ship, the Krinksy, the bigger-but-can’t-go-as-far shuttle, the regular spaceship, [Keith: Right.] and continues to do the thing that he does around stew time, which is I guess just aggravate people. What do y’all get up to, now that you’re back here? What is your plan in this moment, or do you, is there a plan? Is your moment to just take a breath? What are y’all focusing on here? I mean, I guess I’ll say that the circus is gonna go to land on Dokine sometime soon, and I know Wellaway you have a certain obligation there. Keith: Mhm. Austin: But kinda bigger picture, where are y’all at having escaped the terrible violence that has now descended two previous places you’ve been? What is your, are you like, alright let’s get back to work with the circus. Or are you having other thoughts at this time? Keith: I think that maybe the prompting from the boss gave the idea to shore up this relationship. Austin: Mm. I heard it. Keith: Thank you. [Ali chuckles] Just trying to hit it a little — Art: I just thought we were not… Austin: Say again Art? Art: I thought we were just not acknowledging it. Austin: Ah yeah, you’re right, that’s what I should’ve done. Keith: [laughs] I did hear Art not acknowledging. [Austin and Ali laugh] Art: It’s important when working in audio medium — Keith: To audibly disengage. Art: To audibly not acknowledge, to, ‘mm.’ [Keith laughs] You gotta let ‘em hear it miss. Austin: Right. That’s right. See that’s ten years right there, of expertise and wisdom. [Art chuckles] See, we’ve been doing this for a minute. Ali: That’s weird, ‘cause I thought this was Keith “No Misses” Carberry. Austin: Hoo! Keith: Well, it was the, look. I don’t wanna, I’m not, not to — Austin: She just called Keith maidenless? [Art and Keith laugh] Ali: Nooo! [laughs] Keith: Look, I don’t wanna show the sausage being made, but it was meant to miss! [Austin: Mhm. Mhm. Mhm.] It was missed, I missed on purpose. Ali: Yeah, uh huh. Austin: Yeah. [sigh] That’s the, I mean that’s the gag sometimes. Art: Breaking it for fun. Austin: Yeah. Keith: Mhm. Mhm. Art: I mean — ugh. Keith: No, let’s do it. We’re, hey, we’re going to the comedy festival. [cross] [Ali giggles] Austin: I mean listen, yeah, we’re about to go to the comedy festival at the conceptual art planet. Y’know? Keith: Yeah. Art: I’m just so excited for like, the show post-mortem. For when we like, have completely wrapped on Friends at the Table, I want the post-mortem to just be like a deep dive into like, so what is comedy? Austin: [chuckles] Yeah, uh huh. [Keith laughs] Art: So when we set out questions for the entire history of Friends at the Table, someone ask ‘what is comedy? So that we can — Austin: We could just do that now for extra money, Art. Ali: We could, yeah. Art: Um, okay. Austin: Ten dollar level, we’ll answer questions about anything. Keith: The definitive answer to ‘what is comedy?’ Austin: The Definitive Answer, the new podcast. Art: Well, for the show post-mortem we can save questions like, [Austin: Right.] so what was going on at the end of the Fangamer contract? [Ali laughs] Austin: Yeah, that we could, yes, uh huh. Now that’s one we could wrap back around to. Art: [cross] Who are the five people in actual play you actually don't like? Austin: [cross] They should’ve printed more maps. It comes down to, how did they not know how many people would want a Marielda map? In my personal opinion. Art: Well, it was just, we had to deal with that problem eight times. Keith: And then guessing very badly eight times. Ali: So anyway. Keith: Not knowing and guessing badly. Ali: So anyway! [laughs] Austin: Hye! Ali: What’s going on with the comedy moon of Dokine? Austin: Great question. The moon isn’t the comedy moon, I guess I should reiterate. The moon is a weird art— Art: It’s a hilarious moon. Looks wild. Austin: It does look wild. You can look at it here again, it’s this golden spiral orb marble. Ali: Oh, riiight! Austin: It has these city-states that have, the city-states have wings and I think of them almost like butterfly cities. Where like, there’s a central butterfly body that is stable. And then also, they build out on the fuckin’ wings and the wings flutter so slow that it’s basically okay to be out on the wings. [Art chuckles] Keith: Okay. Art: Love to hear it. Austin: And then they are like, flying these city states above golden mist that is like, erosive, or corrosive rather, but also kind of like, the mists make you see — there’s a sort of like, mirage quality to the mist also. I even think they might use that in some of their technology, like they make movies on this planet and I think maybe part of the way they make movies is by projecting this golden mist in special ways? I don’t know, I don’t, y’know. I just have vague ideas about how this place works, we’ll fill in the gaps as we get there. And they’re like a real, y’know, the Impulse there — we were at Ulled, and as a reminder Ulled’s old Impulse was ‘find space’. Like, alright, go find a little space for yourself somewhere to collect yourself or to impose yourself, whatever. Dokine’s is to ‘resist stillness’. Dokine is all about like, ooh I got a new idea, I got a new project, I got a new place to go. ‘Resist stillness’ is its main Impulse and so, there’s a real avant-garde nature to the place. But the particular city-state that you’re going to head towards to do both the circus stuff and also because of the comedy festival, the Wooden Potato Comedy Festival, is a city-state called Arridea, A-R-R-I-D-E-A, which is like, it is the sort of kitschiest of the city-states on Dokine. It’s the one that is most interested in traditional popular entertainment. But like, it’s still the avant-garde art moon, and so you’re still getting some up-its-own-ass stuff inside of that kitschy space, y’know? Art: Yeah, I’ve been to Just For Laughs in Montreal, I understand exactly what you’re talking about. Austin: Boom. Gettem. Keith: Wow. Art: Ha ha! Keith: And no one can ever say that again. Austin: [chuckles] God. Keith: RIP to Just For Laughs. Austin: Yeah they’re done. It’s over now. Art just killed the Just For Laughs comedy festival. Keith: Oh yeah, this was it by the way. If you hear this later, this was what caused them to cancel that. Austin: That’s right. So yeah, that’s the place that’s below. But I don’t, y’know, as always, this is Realis, it shifts in scope and scale according to the needs of the story and the whims of its tellers, as far as I’m concerned we could say like, wow! [wipes hands] What a good time we had down on Dokine! If the players have no interest in going to the comedy festival. Now, I don’t think that’s who we have here. I don’t think that this is that group of people. But if that’s what we wanted to do, we could do that. And likewise, if before we wanna get there you wanna do some other shit, I wanna leave that space kind of open here back on the train so you could talk to NPCs and all that stuff, y’know? I mean, speaking of, one, I’m thinking about this now, was Candide with you during the last section? Or was — [cross] She was not, right? Keith: [cross] No, Candide was working on the box. Austin: She was working on the box. So, I think she is like, as soon as Krinsky is gone and she can kinda sneak out of the shadows, she’s like, Austin (as Candide): [hushed] You got us a ship? Can I go check it out? Ali (as Hye): You’re allowed to introduce yourself, yes. Austin: They’re just gonna run in there, and I think you probably — I think just runs in there. That’s it for now. Keith: [chuckles] Okay! Austin: For now. Yeah. And disappears inside of the Orphan Vessel. What about the rest of you, what are you gettin’ up to now that you’re back here? What is the sort of exhale for your character here before we move onto other stuff? Keith: I can’t exhale, I gotta work on my act. [Ali giggles] Austin: Oh, interesting. Do you know what you’re gonna do? Keith: No, I have no idea. I’ve been very busy. Austin: And you’re day two, as a reminder. Keith: I’m day two, yes. Middle day. The free day. The liberating day. Austin: That’s right. What does your prep for your act look like? Keith: Um, there’s two ways that I could do it. The first way would be, I’ve got to go into my room and then write down a bunch of thoughts until something’s good, and then go back to all the good ones and try to figure something out with them. Austin: Mhm. Keith: The other thing is that I could go into the cafeteria and start fucking with people and see if anything comes out of that, and I don’t think either of these are that strong. But I don’t have a lot of time, I mean I only just got the invitation, and I’ve been busy since. Austin: You’ve been busy, yeah yeah. We don’t need to zoom in on either of those, although I think picking one is telling about who Wellaway is. I’m curious which method you do. Keith: Um, well let’s go with ‘resist stillness’ and we’ll go into the cafeteria. Austin: Love this. Yeah, great. So, you start pranking people in the cafeteria. Keith: Yeah. I start doing, look, y’know, everyone knows crowd work is the new thing that everyone cares about. So, I start doing impromptu sort of, uh — Austin: Are you doing insult comic stuff? Keith: No, more just like gently ribbing stuff. Austin: Okay. Keith: Not insult. We’re in a new age of crowd work, Austin. Austin: I see. Yeah. This is — pause — this is real, huh? Keith: This is real. [cross] This is very real. Austin: This is why this is all over my fuckin’ YouTube shorts now? Keith: Yeah, yeah yeah. Art: Yeah. I think it’s a Tiktok, where this came from. Austin: That makes sense. Keith: Yeah. Art: Yeah it’s, I mean because it’s on Tiktok I think it’s all staged. [Austin: Right, sure.] But, maybe it isn’t. Ali: Yeah. Keith: I think it’s a — Austin: Does Wellaway have feelings about this development? Which we’ve now just mapped into our particular reality of Realis? Keith: Yeah, y’know, in the real world I think it’s multiple things — I think you have a huge bag of material that you’ve filmed, right? So maybe it’s staged or maybe it’s like, I have five hours of material and three funny minutes of crowd work that I can put up and make it look like this is what I do. Austin: Right. Keith: So this is the reality of what’s happening I think, in our world. In the fake world, I think that Wellaway is like, well, kind of messing with people and ribbing and doing crowd work is part of the day job anyway, so there’s actually an easier entry point into getting onstage and doing something. And it has less to do with like, artistry or motivations and more to do with like, an innate skillset. Austin: That you’ve already developed because of being a Zanni. Keith: Right. Austin: Right? Right. Do you, what is Wellaway’s feeling that like, the folks on Dokine feel about this sort of crowd work? Is this a place that you — Keith: I think I’m happy to be going day two. Austin: Interesting. Keith: I think on day two no one is going to be like, thinking about the statement of it. Austin: I see. Whereas day one or day three, again, that would be the case. Keith: Might be, yeah. Austin: Yeah yeah yeah. Totally. Okay. Hye and Donnie, what are y’all getting up to back on the train? Ali: I — this is not a shock either, I don’t think. I think that I want to, there’s something that’s occurring to me, that like, our castaway can like, hang out on my ship for a while, and is like, safe there? And I think that I want to chat it up with my ship a little bit to find out what the plan when we land is. Austin: The speed of which it’s becoming your ship is remarkable. Ali: [laughs] The ship. The potential for it to be my ship. I didn’t make any claims, I didn’t make any, um, y’know, I was very casual and neutral when my boss was asking about it. I think that there’s a big potential that my — the ship [laughs] is gonna land on the planet and be like good… see… toodle-oo! [Keith and Ali laugh] I would like to avoid that if I could. In my heart of hearts I would like to avoid that. But I would just like to have a chat and see where the vibe is. Candide Meets the Jewel [00:26:54] Austin: Yeah. [Ali chuckles] So I guess as you step back aboard the Jubilant Jewel, this is where you hear Candide from somewhere deep inside the Vessel just go ‘hello!’ Really loud. They’re trying to find the best place to shout inside the ship so that their voice would be carried to the entire thing all at once. Which, I don’t know who taught them that’s how you talk to an Orphan Vessel, I don’t think that’s how you talk to an Orphan Vessel, but that’s what they’re doing. And they’re like, (as Candide): [shouting flatly] My name is Candide Morata! I’m a stowaway on the train ship, and I’m, I’m here! I’ve never met an Orphan Vessel before, what’s your name? Austin: [Lynchian] I’m slipping into David Lynch a little bit here! [Ali chuckles] This is not right for this character. Keith: We should get David Lynch in on this. Austin: I would love to get David Lynch in on Realis, I think it would get very weird when he insisted that it all became about transcendental meditation, [Keith laughs] but, y’know, that’s the cost you pay with him these days. So yeah — Keith: [Lynchian shouting] Have you thought much about repetition? Austin: Lemme tell you Keith! [Keith and Ali laugh] Ugh, lemme tell ya. This is the part he would like. So, yes, you’re able to come back on the ship and I think it seems you have a vaguely telepathic conversational channel open with the Jubilant Jewel? Is that fair to say, Hye? Ali: It felt like that, yeah. Austin: Or at the very least, maybe you speak aloud but it speaks back to you through your mind. Ali: Right, yeah, there were definitely some, I was getting some visions [Austin: Uh huh, this is true] of their life, and I was able to communicate some ideas and some intentions. And I think that like, maybe that’s the way, maybe I find Candide and like, (as Hye): I don’t think this is the method, [wheeze] to introduce yourself. And I lead her to the, like, the captain’s bay or whatever. The cockpit. [Austin: The cockpit.] Yes. [laughs] Austin: The captain’s bay — I mean, this is the thing, right? This ship has been made up to have a cockpit in the traditional sense. You can imagine an Orphan Vessel that has a front viewing window but like, all of the navigation happens somewhere else in the ship, right? But this one, because it’s coming from the Killiad Consortium, who is this very kind of traditional space federation type thing, has a big kind of — I mean, in fact, maybe what it has is a bridge, more than a cockpit. It has enough seats for eight to ten people up front. It’s not just a small cockpit with like three or four seats, or one seat or whatever. So yeah, you’re able to go there, and I think Candide happily comes with. (as Candide): Will you introduce me? Ali (as Hye): Um, yes. I believe if you speak out loud here, in a conversational tone, you will be understood. And if you place your hand here on the controls, very, very gently — Austin (as Candide): You’re gonna let me drive? Ali (as Hye): Um, no. [Ali and Keith laugh] But, you can get a feel for it, and introduce yourself. I’d like you to feel comfortable here in the time that we have it. Austin (as Candide): Oh, do we have to give it back? Ali (as Hye): Well, the ship isn’t owned, and it has become recently free from a thing that I would not like to repeat. Austin (as Candide): [sigh] Hi, uh, uh, ship. My name’s Candide Morata, I like to learn about things, um, I really like exploring, uh, I really wanna get — I like the moons a lot, the Quartet, but I really wanna see other moons. Um, I really love my friends, they treat me real good. So you can trust them. They… they’ve never lied to me, as far as I — [conspiratorially] as far as I know. Looks at you, kinda squinting. [Keith, Ali, Art laugh] (as Candide): And that’s good. And I don’t think you should lie, I think that’s my one rule. It’s okay not to tell the truth sometimes, but try not to lie. Um. And I think that’s it. Now what? Ali (as Hye): Now you know you’ve spoken from the heart. And, um, I think that, uh, we should ask the ship what they would like to do when we reach Dokine. Austin: And as you stay that, simply saying that aloud, you get, both of you, this deep sense of sleepiness, and like, an ache. And, maybe you do get a mental picture of some sort of garage or docking bay that is like some sort of, almost like a ship spa? It’s like a spa for Orphan Vessels? Ali: Oh yeah, like when R2-D2 and C-3PO go to the — [laughs] spa? Austin: Exactly, yes. Y’know, it’s like a deep clean, or like when you see those videos of animals being taken — y’know like someone giving a giant dog a bath. And the dog is like, nervous at first but at the end the dog is like, the happiest thing in the world, y’know? Or those like, you know those videos — I’m just gonna say this. You know the videos with the hooves in them? Keith: [cross] Yeah. Yeah yeah yeah, I know what you’re talking about. Ali: [laughs] I sure don’t! I don’t! Keith: These are horrible videos where a person whose job it is to scrape, y’know, [Austin: Gross stuff.] hooves of sheep and horses — Ali: Ohh. Austin: [cross] Yeah. And often it’s like, oh no, they have some sort of — Keith: [cross] It’s all a big fingernail, so you use a big knife to slice off the bits of nail and clean it out with like, a pick ‘cause it’s full of dirt. Austin: [cross] But at the end it looks so relieved, and so clean, and so… Ali: Sure. Keith: Right. Austin: And sometimes there’s like a gross sickness in there that they have to relieve the pressure of. It’s gross, don’t go look this stuff up. Yeah, so there’s that sense of like, deep animal care, y’know? And I think the ship, maybe it knows a stop. What type of person… we’ll get there, we’ll get there. And I think it projects that kind of image, and maybe on a map, it kind of like p-p-p-p-ping! Y’know, drops a ping on where this place is. Is it on the same… yeah, let’s say it’s on the same city-state, it’s on Arridea, the city-state where the festival is, the comedy festival, so that you can be in the same general vicinity of each other. Yeah, it kinda just wants to go get… like, it needs a spa day. It needs basic maintenance. You’ve done a good job of like, freeing it from its too-claustrophobic shell, but that’s not a one and done type maneuver, y’know? And I think that you also fundamentally get the feeling kinda wash over you of like, thank you, I also don’t know what this means for us in the future. Like, I can’t make you any promises, I really appreciate you going out of your way for me. [Ali: Mm!] But, y’know, we’ll see. Ali: Real noncommittal. I understand, we all understand! [laughs] Austin: Yeah. But thankful! Y’know like, noncommittal in the way of like… Ali: I can’t make this promise right now. Austin: Exactly. Ali: If I wanted to make this commitment, I cannot make it right now. I have some other things I have to do first. Austin: That’s right. Exactly. Ali: I completely understand. I think the thing that my response, like, I’m obviously happy to make the [laughing] spa arrangements, question mark, [Austin: Uh huh, yeah.] one would have to make. I think the thing that I do right now is, I do whatever the computer end of the ship maintenance is, which is like, y’know, print out what systems are weird. Austin: Are busted, and yeah. What are the diagnostics, and etcetera. Ali: And then I think that I tell Candide [sic] like, I’d like you to feel comfortable here in the trip that we have, and like, y’know, you should — Austin (as Candide): So I don’t, so that, so I don’t have to hide everywhere, is what you’re tellin’ me? Ali (as Hye): No, no. I think that it’ll be a nice reprieve for you, to feel as though you can exist here and speak loudly and walk freely. And, if you could help me in exchange by organizing some spaces on the ship… Austin (as Candide): You’re givin’ me chores. Ali (as Hye): Well… well. Pride in your environment — Austin (as Candide): No no no. I never had chores before. Ali (as Hye): Exactly! They’re very rewarding. [cross] And you won’t be doing them alone… Austin (as Candide): I’m curious. I’m skeptical, but I’m curious. Ali (as Hye): Well — Austin (as Candide): ‘Cause they show up in books all the time. Ali (as Hye): True. Um, how about this? You walk around the ship and think about what chores you might be interested in doing, and I’ll come back here tomorrow morning and help you with the rest. Austin (as Candide): Alright. Ali (as Hye): Okay? Oh, and I’ll bring you dinner. It’s stew. Austin (as Candide): Oh, I already ate stew. Ali (as Hye): Oh okay. Well then — Austin (as Candide): Please. I wasn’t waiting for you to show up before I ate stew. Ali (as Hye): No I know, I just know that it can be difficult for you sometimes. Austin (as Candide): I see. I appreciate it. Yeah, I made a few other stew friends, just in case. Backup, y’know, just in case the three of you weren’t there. Ali (as Hye): Right. Austin (as Candide): Yeah. That girl Paige got me some stew, so. Ali (as Hye): Have you spoken to… Who’s my meat guy? Who’s my meat guy, wait… [wheeze] Austin (as Candide): Kenneth! Kenneth is your meat guy. Yes I talked to Kenneth. Ali (as Hye): Kenneth. Kenneth. Perfect. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow. [laughs] Austin (as Candide): Bye! I’ll think about chores. Donnie is Listless [00:37:59] Austin: Ah, you kinda leave Donnie here, all by themself. Art: Fine? Austin: Yeah. Art: A little listless, I think right now. Austin: That’s fair. Art: I think there’s a list problem. Austin: That makes it sound like you have like, a list of things to do that aren’t getting done. Art: I mean, maybe that’s right. Austin: Do you think it has been the sort of, the brief, like, you brushed against something that felt like it could connect you to your big question and now it’s been kind of pulled away? Or now you’ve been on the run since then? Art: Yeah. Austin: Is there anything you can do to investigate that stuff from here on the train, or on the Jubilant Jewel, or do you think there’s a like, you gotta go somewhere for that stuff? Art: I think it might be that Donnie’s gotta go somewhere. And maybe this like, maybe this festival is one of those places, because people are gonna come to see it, [Austin: Right, sure. And you never know — ] potentially from anywhere. Austin: Right. That’s true. So — Art: But its, uh, it’s hard to prepare, y’know? Preparing to socialize isn’t a… Austin: Well, I guess that’s a, y’know… I imagine there are ways to prepare to socialize when you’re a ghost, right? Art: Sure. I mean, some of it might be involving, I need to do some Sentence leveling up. Austin: Yeah, you do, you do. You have a few Sentences — [Art: I forget the game word for that.] — Realization, might have to do a little Realization. Though I also think, y’know, maybe this is silly, but you said the word socialization and I was like, oh is Donnie gonna get like, a disguise? [Keith chuckles] Is Donnie gonna, like… Art: Like Ghost Dad! Austin: Like Ghost Dad. Or similar ghost disguise properties. How many times do ghosts — [typing] ghosts…that wear…disguises. Art: Oh ‘cause, it turns out that — Austin: Ghost Dad not so good. Keith: Right. Art: I might have forgotten who the star of Ghost Dad is too. Austin: That’s fine. We’re good. I’m not holdin’ that against you. I’m just wondering, are there other ghost dads? Art: This also wasn’t what I was thinking of, I think I’m thinking of The Invisible Man. Austin: You are thinking of the Invisible Man. I was thinking the same thing. With like, the gloves and the big sunglasses? Art: Yeah. Keith: Right, yeah, sure. Austin: Yeah. But yes, could you set one of those up? Could you go about this, could Donnie go undercover to the comedy festival as a person who is not a ghost? A mortal? Art: Maybe. I mean, if media has taught me anything, the best chance is to find someone at the festival who like, got there and immediately died. Austin: Right. And then you can take their identity… Art: Take their body. Ali: Hm! Keith: And that does happen every year. Art: Statistically! I mean, have you ever been at like, a concert or something and thought like, someone who was supposed to be here probably died on the way here? Is that just me? Keith: No, that’s never happened to me. [Ali chuckles] Art: Oh. Okay. But like, a big enough show, it’s statistically likely. Ghost Dad has 6% on Rotten Tomatoes. Austin: Damn. Keith: Wow. Is that good? Austin: Yeah, 6% of what? Art: Better than any movie I ever made. Austin: Should we descend to the golden-waved planet, the golden…smogged planet? The golden-clouded planet? Not a planet, it’s a moon. The golden-hued moon of Dokine, or is there more to do up here first? Art: Wait, am I Invisible Man-ing it or am I possessing a dead body? Austin: [cross] Oh, I guess that’s a good question. What did you wanna do? It’s your plan. Art: Possessing a dead body is like, a level of grossness we might not wanna get into? Austin: Yeah I think that might pass our, not describing injury but it is a little much. Keith: Could you psychically assemble a dead body out of like, meat? Art: Out of meat? Ali: [cross] [laughing] I don’t think that’s better… Keith: [cross] Or whatever! Art: [cross] Or like, make a Frankenstein? Austin: That’s not better. Keith: No no, not like out of human parts, but out of like, beef. Austin: Right, out of the butcher’s… Art: Like a meatwad. Austin: No, this is worse. Keith: [laughing] I don’t — I want it to look human. Austin: I think we could Invisible Man this. I mean, this is an art and culture moon, you know? Like, people wear all sorts of scarves and cool fashion, you know what I mean? We are on the high fashion moon. Keith: I put the baby from the Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure stuff we did for Media Club Plus bonus that you can get at this, where you’re already at, friendsatthetable.cash. That works for me, as a baby. You just cover yourself in makeup. Austin: In makeup, right. Ali: Ohhh, yeah. Art: Ohh. Keith: Because the covering yourself — Art: Well then you’d need scarves to cover the back. Austin: Here’s what I want. I want a scene of y’all figuring this out. Like, is this, who — Keith: Pitching ideas. Austin: Pitching ideas, or like Wellaway you using clown makeup to help with this, maybe using a Bond to make this. And then I would like to be able to give Donnie an Ephemera that’s just a, my human disguise always, you know, da da da da da. Art: Yeah I mean, it certainly fits with the Bond I have with Wellaway, when I’m with Wellaway I remember what I once was and feel at peace. Just putting on some makeup and fifty scarves — Austin: [cross] Do you go and ask Wellaway, hey I wanna, sorry to interrupt — Art: Yeah hey I wanna be able to blend in, I don’t wanna be a ghost this whole time — Keith: Right, you don’t wanna scare everybody that you walk past. Austin: Right. Art: Right. Austin: Lot of people, big metropolis. Keith: Yeah. I’ll say this, people on Dokine… Dokine? Austin: Dokine. Keith: Okay. I lost confidence there for a second. Austin: No you got it. Keith: They might enjoy being slightly scared by your presence. Austin: Interesting. ‘Dokine’s artists always pain with unseen colors, Dokine’s light always alters the obvious’, these are some Moon Sentences. ‘Dokine’s skies are always crowded,’ and ‘the golden mist of Dokine always corrodes.’ Those are our current Moon Sentences. Keith: And I should read also this part here, ‘the light turns and what you saw you didn’t, or what was was else, or that is is no longer, or what lives now melts.’ Austin: Yeah, Dokine — Art: Well I think that this can and should have an uncanny quality. Austin: Sure. Keith: Okay. Art: But it shouldn’t be like, I shouldn't just be rawdogging ghostliness, you know? Keith: Right. Have you thought about mummy? Austin: Ooh, interesting. Yeah, here’s what I would love. I would love three or four qualities to what this disguise is, and then I feel like you’ve earned an Ephemera, between the two of you kind of collabing on it. Keith: Yeah. I should say I’m bringing mummy in from Invisible Man just to get it in character. Austin: Sure. A classic version of an invisible man. Art: I think I want, even if we’re doing mummy, I want like a human face. But we can go with like, a mask if you think that’s more appropriate. Keith: Mask, we can get you some, there’s, okay. It’s a little tacky, but there’s a lot of people wearing happy face-sad face drama masks down there. Art: Oh, sure. Can we make one that’s like a — what if a happy face drama mask with like, some paint on it to make it look just a little more like, what if it had like, blush and eyeliner and it looked a little more — Keith: Oh, that’s a statement. Art: Yeah, yeah. Keith: Okay. So you wanna take a dramatic mask, of which I have a small chestful — Austin: [cross] Classically trained, so of course you do. Keith: [cross] And sort of dress it up. Art: Yeah, give it some tone. Keith: Okay. Yeah, we can do that. Austin: Does it look so realistic that it looks like a person’s face? Keith: I think — Art: No, I’m sort of thinking, you know in the ‘89 Batman movie when [Austin: I do.] Jack Nicholson puts the makeup on? But it doesn’t look right? And like, probably a step further, ‘cause that’s at least a human face. Austin: Yeah, you’re thinkin’, I’m trying to get a good screenshot here, yeah. Like, a little messed up. Art: Yeah, there’s an eeriness to this, right? Austin: There sure is. [Art laughs] Yeah, yeah. Art: Two steps further than this, I think. Austin: And so, more clearly a mask than this. Art: Yeah. Austin: But still this sort of — yeah, okay, so there’s… Art: God, the makeup work in this movie is really good. Austin: Batman ‘89, hoo. I have to rewatch it, it’s been a minute. So that’s one element of this outfit, I need more elements. Tell me what else are you wearing? Art: Then like a bunch of Ace bandage or whatever. Austin: Oh, so then under the mask you’re doing a mummy? Keith: To cover the back. Art: Yeah, I think it’s mummy all the way. I think behind the eyeholes it’s just bandage. Austin: Okay. This is good. Keith: This is a question, you don’t have to cut out the holes to see. Art: Right, I don’t think so. Austin: No. Art: ‘Cause I can just like — I don’t really know how sensory stuff works for Donnie. Austin: Yeah. Art: But I think they just sort of like, know what’s going on. Austin: [cross] Yeah, you always wield a spectral power. Keith: You would know that you can’t see once we cover your eyes, you’d go oh, I can’t see. So if that’s not true, we’d know right away. Art: Right, yeah. I think it’s gonna be fine. Austin: Can you close your eyes? Can you turn off any of your perceptive powers? Art: I think it’s more like turning off then just closing your eyes. Austin: Can you turn off ones that humans can’t turn off? Like, hearing or touch? Art: Probably. Like touch, yeah. Austin: Yeah. You’re always intangible. Interesting. Alright, so then it’s mummy. And then what’s the clothing part of this? ‘Cause it’s not like you have a big wardrobe, Donnie. Art: I think there’s some like, body jewelry on top of the bandage, ‘cause you have to do something to like, adorn it, you know. Austin: Yeah, so you're not doing bandages over invisible skin and then like, a dress or like, pants. You’re doing mummy body and then some jewels to spice up the mummy body. Art: Yeah, and then maybe I think like, a three-quarter length jacket. Austin: Interesting. What type of jewels are we talking? I mean, probably like, stage jewels ‘cause again we’re working with the clown’s wardrobe. Art: Yeah, we’re talkin’ stage jewels, and I think some like, bangles, like gold junk. Bunch of bracelets and… Austin: Yeah. This is fun, this is… Art: A big emerald. A big emerald on a chain. Austin: Hye, have you seen Donnie’s new look? Ali: [laughs] I maybe like, walk past. Austin: Yeah. Ali: I maybe see Wellaway and Donnie like, walk out of Wellaway’s room and I’m like, (as Hye): Who is that? [Austin laughs] Keith (as Wellaway): It’s Donnie. Ali (as Hye): Oh. That’s an interesting look for you. Art: In like, a really over the top human-y voice, (as Donnie): Charmed, I’m sure. [Austin and Keith laugh] This is what you are to me. Ali (as Hye): I, wow, I… Art (as Donnie): This is a ghost insult, you’re devastated. Ali (as Hye): Why, because you made fun of my humaniness? I realize what a human sounds like to you? Art: (as Donnie): In ghost society this is devastating. [Ali laughs] Art: I don’t know that Donnie is aware of ghost society. [cross] I don’t think Donnie’s met another ghost. Austin: Yeah, I don’t think you’ve been — have you met another ghost? We don’t really know. Art: I don’t think so. Keith: We’ve had a lot of adventures. Austin: That’s true, we’ve listed many of them, that’s true. Keith: You might not have socialized with a ghost. Art: Yeah. I’m not a member of ghost society, I don’t get ghost magazines. Ali and Keith: Mm. Austin: So what’s this thing do? I think this is zero, I think it’s probably Reality zero. I’ve written, ‘my human disguise always…’ What’s the end of that sentence? What’s it always do? Art: My human disg — no, that doesn’t work. I was gonna say my human disguise doesn’t attract too much attention, but I really made a gaudy nightmare… [cross] Austin: Yeah, I don’t know that that’s possible. Keith: Well we’re going to the gaudy planet. Austin: You are, but it is a universal statement. Maybe, what if… Art: My human disguise is gaudy and memorable. [Keith laughs] Austin: It always does a thing, right? So Sentences always have always in them. And then, or never, theoretically, but I try to lean towards the positive instead of the negative. So always. And then — Art: My human disguise always attracts the right attention. Ali: Ooh! Austin: [typing] Always attracts the right attention. Now we’re talkin’. Boom. Alright. Love this. Perfect. Alright, so with a new disguise prepared, I think we kinda montage this a little bit. We get y’all doing the dress up, we get Candide trying out various chores over the next few days over in the ship. [Ali laughs] You know, I think at one point Hye, Candide asks you to take a look at the box that they were sent. Ali: Uh huh. Austin: They have not been able to get it open. Keith: Wow. Austin: So maybe that’s part of this montage too, if you’ve found the time to take a look at it. I’ve kinda described it as a puzzle box, you know. I guess with more time to describe it, I think it’s like a wooden box that kind of has a, what type of shape is this? Like a, um, what is the shape of a metronome? You know how a metronome has like a sort of, what is this shape? It’s kind of like a pyramid, I guess it’s like a pyramid. Y’know. It’s just a tall, thin pyramid. Ali: Oh, sure sure sure. Austin: That type of shape. And all around it it has like, it’s made up of a bunch of small sliding wooden bits, but it does not feel like a puzzle, I mean it’s a puzzle, but it doesn’t feel like any type of moving those around is getting you anywhere. Obviously I think Candide did as best a job as they could trying to play it like it were a flash game, you know? And like, trying to slide various pieces around until things lined up, or y’know, played it like one of those games that are at the friendlies or the Golden Corral, y’know? I don’t think that’s how you solve it, I don’t really know, I got it to make a sound once, but I couldn’t really figure out what the sound was, I don’t know. And so has asked you for help with that. So if you’re up for that, maybe in our fun montage, I don’t know what song is playing during this, [Ali chuckles] but you’re investigating this box. Art: Weirdly, it’s “Eye of the Tiger.” [Keith chuckles] Austin: “Eye of the Tiger,” right, perfect. We get a fun cutaway where the eye of the tiger looks like it’s the moon, with the bright yellow eye, and then it like crosscuts to where your eye would be behind the mask, y’know? Art: Yeah, and “Eye of the Tiger” always fits. Austin: Good to know. How much could “Eye of the Tiger” be? Keith: Cheap. Literally no one wants to listen to that song. Art: Just put it in the notes that we want Jack to make a song as iconic as “Eye of the Tiger” to go here. Austin: Jack sent me a wild song today, that’s so good. [Ali chuckles] Alright, so I think, yeah. A few days pass as you prepare to descend down to Dokine and begin the kind of circus stay that’s normal for the circus. Is there anything else anybody wants to do before we do that part? Before we kind of move into phase two? Keith and Ali: I’m phase two ready. Art: Yeah. Landing at the Dokine Ship Spa [00:54:52] Austin: Alright. You all descend to, again as I described before, a city that’s like a butterfly. This is Arridea, I’ll put it in a chat somewhere. A-R-R-I-D-E-A. Third largest city-state of Dokine. You know, you descend down to the kind of big center stretch which is where the bulk of the most important structures and stuff are. These city-states are basically like big ships, they’re not Orphan Vessels, I don’t think they’re living ships, but they are designed to seem like big living organisms even if they are not literally that. And the very front of it is a sort of giant communications and operation center, and then down the center spine of the city is everything from residential to the entertainment district, you got all that stuff. The spa that the Orphan Vessel wants to visit is towards the edge of what you would call one of the wings of one of this big city state. Are you gonna fly this down, are you travelling as a group together on the train, are you going down in the Orphan Vessel, what’s the spread of where y’all are at? Keith: If we’re going to the spa… Austin: Mhm. The ship-spa, to be clear. Keith: The ship-spa, I wouldn't mind tagging along if that means going on the Orphan Vessel, then that’s fine. Ali: Yeah, I think that it makes sense to land at the ship-spa. And I think that maybe what I wanna do is go to our boss and ask if there’s any large carnival equipment I could also bring. Austin: To get, like, cleaned? Ali: Yeah! Art: [cross] Like a calliope. Ali: Like a little bundle deal, y’know? Austin: I see. Sure. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. Sure, yeah. I think there’s probably like, it is a, they can’t do everything here but they can do certain types of things. Are there rides at the carnival? I think they can basically do anything, on top of doing the ship, they can do things that are like, the metal pieces that would go on a ship. So anything that is a big metal thing they could de-rust it and improve it in that way. Y’know, things like, they’re not gonna help you repair cables. They’re not gonna — Ali: No, but the big thing with the hammer, and the thing goes up and it goes wowoowoowoob! Austin: Yes, totally, yes, the hammer…hit machine. Ali: That could use a polish or two, y’know? There might be some sort of like, trampoline things? [laughs] Austin: Uh huh. The trampolines, for the acrobats. Of course. Ali: You know, if this is a place where spaceships exist, I think that there’s some sort of propulsion entertainment engine there that we could bring over. Um, what’s…yeah. [chuckles] Austin: The person who runs this place — so the spa itself is big, right? Because it has to be big enough for these giant spaceships to land in it. Not giant, they’re not city-sized, right? The Orphan Vessel is, we talked about this before, is fairly large but it’s not like a Star Destroyer, right? But it’s big enough to land here, and it kind of like, you’re able to land it on kind of a docking pad this is able to like, then descend down until it is almost until a whole ship is underground? Almost like it’s gonna get filled in with water like a jacuzzi, you know what I mean? Or like, the whole thing could be covered with water or, you know, a lid could close on top of it so they could fill in an area with steam or whatever. They help unload your stuff, there’s a bunch of humanoid workers who are moving stuff around but the person who runs this is like a giant person, is a giant, like blue-grey skinned alien with a long neck and four super big long arms that are, like, she couldn’t fit inside of this ship, inside of the Orphan Vessel. Or like, maybe she could fit inside if she was like, you would have to invent a new way to get on the ship for her to get into the ship. She would like, fill up the hallways. And she is seated crosslegged kind of in the middle of a sort of, she is like the hub and around her are a bunch of these docking pads where ships are landing for repairs and stuff like that. And so they move the carnival stuff to a second docking pad that stuff gets lowered into, and, y’know, you’re able to look up at her and she is like, (as Ship Spa Boss): Welcome to the spa. Tell me, which services do you need from us today? Ali (as Hye): Um hi. Nice to meet you. I have a, uh, diagnostic report [chuckles] from my Orphan Vessel, which outlines some things that need attention, and some, you know, basic upkeep of some additional equipment that has seen a bit of wear and tear. Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Mm. And your relationship with the Vessel? Ali (as Hye): Uh…friendly? Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Friendly. And kind of like, reaches out to it with this long, slow arm. And like, kind of reaches down very animal caretaker vibes, very like, moves the hand in in a way that’s familiar for her as the person doing it but like, you could almost feel the Orphan Vessel kind of unsure about it. And then like, reaches down and touches what must be some sort of lymph node or like, you know what I mean? And then is like, the Vessel kinda goes like, buh-koo. And like, steam comes out for a second and seems to have relaxed. And she’s like, (as Ship Spa Boss): How long have you been in command of the Vessel? Ali (as Hye): Um, a few days. Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): [mutters] Few days… Ali (as Hye): It was recently rescued from its previous, uh, commander. Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Hm. Ali (as Hye): And it appears to have been abused. Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Yes, I see. And these machines you’ve delivered into docking bay C? Ali (as Hye): Um, yes. Well, I, professionally, am with a traveling circus, and we rely on these for entertainment purposes, and I thought, um, well you know. [chuckles] While we’re making the trip. Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Yes. Well, we care for those who suffer. And while our tools could allow us to repair these other…devices, it is not high priority, you understand? Ali (as Hye): I do now. [laughs] I believe there was a misunderstanding in terms of your goals here previously, um… Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Now, I’m not rejecting the work. I simply can’t guarantee in the same time that our Vessel’s work will be done. Ali (as Hye): Oh please, yes, prioritize the needs of the Vessel first. Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Now payment. How will you be paying? Ali (as Hye): Do you have, um, some sort of a fee book? Austin (as Ship Spa Boss): Mm… And then like, big arm gesture to the front desk, (as Ship Spa Boss): If you’ve not reviewed our fee scheduling, please do so at your earliest convenience. Ali: Do I have money? Austin: Do you have money? [Ali laughs] You know? Ali: Wouldn’t it be great if I had money? We’ve been talking about money. Austin: We’ve been talking about money — Ali: I also just stole so money…money? Austin: Oh, this is true, yes. You did! You did, remember? And in fact, you should have, someone somewhere wrote down, should have written down — Keith: Yeah, I sure have that. Ali: You wrote down that you have three loops, do we all have three loops? Austin: No no no, you have specifically — Keith: No no, that’s in addition to the Ephemera that I have, which is, ‘With the treasure of the Jubilant Jewel, nothing is too expensive,’ Reality three. Ali: [laughs] Okay! Austin: That’s right. So. And let me tell you, if you go over and check out the fee scheduling kiosk or whatever, this is expensive stuff, right? Keith: Yeah. Austin: Y’know, this is the classic thing of, in a world where, in an age of sale, right, like in an era of like, having your own ship is a big deal, keeping care of it, taking care of it is also very expensive. There’s a reason why like, countries were involved in the commissioning and resupply of Vessels in the age of sale or whatever. And you could get by if you know what you’re doing with self repairs and stuff, but you don’t know how to repair a fuckin’ Orphan Vessel. And you don’t — Keith: Especially not one that is extremely, this is not — the person who is flying this thing had not read “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance.” [Ali laughs] Austin: [cross] Yes, truly had not. The person who had been piloting this thing had read, y’know — Keith: “How to Run Your Ship Into the Ground.” Austin: Truly. And yeah, get it replaced with a better one. Y’know, like that’s, very transactional relationship. And you know, maybe at the end of a mission or whatever, this thing would go back into something like a, maybe not a spa but a repair system in the Consortium, and maybe that happens. Certainly they have the money to do upkeep, but it isn’t this sort of woowoo, y’know, new age-y vibe for sure. Ali: Well it’s not — Keith: What were the other robots that we’ve got? What was going on there? I forgot about that. Austin: [cross] What other robots? Keith: We had the machines that they’re like, we’ll fix these but not right away. Ali: Oh it was just like, carnival equipment. Keith: Oh, carnival stuff? Okay. Austin: Yeah, I think Hye showed up thinking that this would be, that I would be putting on Bluff City garage voice. Ali: [laughs] And not ranch… Austin: And instead it’s big weird alien — right, yeah, uh huh. Ali: Yeah, I mean, I guess it would be an Ephemera spend, so maybe this is your call, Keith. Keith: Uh, happy to do it. Austin: [cross] Happy to do it, yeah. Ali: [cross] Okay, yeah. The idea of just like, walking down the Orphan ship ramp with like, a treasure chest full of gold. [laughs] Austin: Yeah! Uh huh. (as Ship Spa Boss:) That will do nicely, She says, revealing that she has eyes literally around the back of her head. Having turned away from you, but is still, y’know, maybe she has one of those, you know those like, books as a kid where you can like, or like a toy where you can spin the different parts of the face? And it’s like, the fancy eyes, and then the big smiling thing. What if her head works like that, but with, it’s all directions and it’s all different face components, you know? [Keith: That’s fun.] She has a bunch of different smiles, and a bunch of different noses and eyes. And then like, some of them reorient towards you even though her body is facing this other direction and dealing with this other ship, to be like, (as Ship Spa Boss:) Ah, yes. That will do nicely. There’s nothing quite like treasure. [Ali laughs] Keith: [chuckles] I’ll say! Austin: Um, hey Wellaway. Keith: Yeah. Austin: He doesn’t see you, but over on one of these other like, ramps, or on one of these other docking things, you see, for fucking sure, the guy that you got into a almost gun — I mean you were fighting him. You were absolutely fighting him. Entire Carousel is here looking at the like, the pricing kiosk to try to figure out how to repair whatever Vessel it is that he and his arrived on. He has not seen you, I don't think that it’s a threat in this particular moment, but he, they are here on this moon with you. Keith: Right. Austin: Having also seemingly escaped the Empest. Keith: And maybe also, maybe they got an invite to the comedy show. [laughs] Austin: Yeah maybe they, maybe they got an invite to the comedy show too, y’know? It’s possible. Keith: Yeah. Austin: Who could say. And yeah, they’re gonna begin work. I think she tells you, Hye, that the work will take four days, um, and to enjoy your time here in the city. And that, if you need anything from the Vessel, you can call ahead, they’ll need some time to prepare it for boarding, you know? On any given day, call ahead, give an hour notice or so and then you can come through and get anything you don’t need. Otherwise, please take everything you need out of the Vessel now. Ali: Can’t think of anything I super need at the moment. Austin: Alright. And so it goes. And again, I wanna really, you step out of the front door of this place and like, you’re looking out at an ocean of these kind of like long golden clouds, beautiful, y’know, the light from Realis — Realis is blue in the sky, but it doesn’t, the sky itself is this sunset hue. And you can see the other three moons in the distance above you, really beautiful looking upwards then you look straight ahead and you really need your sea legs because there is a very subtle sense that the ground you are on is moving up and down as the butterfly wings of the city are kind of going, are flapping in this very gentle way. The very edges will dip into the cloud, but otherwise you’re safe, but there are times when you could like, feel if you were not paying attention, and you suddenly look behind you, it’s like oh shit right, the wing is all the way down right now and it looks like I’m gonna fall, you know? A little scary sometimes. Where are you off to now that your Vessel is being attended to? Wellaway, I think the festival probably starts tomorrow, day one is tomorrow. Keith: Okay. Austin: I don’t know if you wanna go check in on that, if people wanna go deal with other stuff here in this weird art city, art and comedy city. Keith: Yeah, I’ve got a big thing coming in a couple days so I’m willing, I don't feel like I have to sign in yet or anything, (Austin: You’re not gonna go — yeah, yeah) or that that’s something that has to be spent a lot of time on, so I’m willing to tag along with whatever anybody wants to do. Donnie Hits the Books [1:11:22] Austin: Totally. We don’t have to stay day to day, we don’t have to stay, y’know, second to second rather. I guess I’m very curious, Donnie, what your initial debut of this new outfit has been like? Did you go down with the main train crew, or were you here for all this Grand Vessel stuff, or Orphan Vessel stuff? Art: No, I think I was with the train. Austin: So how’s the debut of the new look going? Art: Well, it always attracts the right attention, so it’s going great. Austin: The people aboard are like, (as People Aboard): Oh my god, Donnie! I love — is that you? Art (as Donnie): Yeah yeah, thanks. It’s a new… trying something out, trying to be a little less, you know. Frightening. Austin (as Someone): I’m not frightened at all! Says, says someone. Art (as Donnie): There you go. That’s a weird thing to say, but thank you. [Keith chuckles] Austin: [cross] I think Paige, not Paige, jeez. I think Candide is like, (as Candide): Hmm. I like it — I’m not sure it’s the real you. But what is the real anybody, y’know? So maybe it’s, maybe it’s real enough? Art (as Donnie): Yeah, I think that’s the way you gotta think about it. Austin: And, what are you, do you have plans to investigate anything here on this moon? Outside of the comedy festival. Art: Yeah, I do think, yeah. I’m trying to find out about any sort of Principia… Austin: Stuff. Sure. Art: Connection. Yeah, I’m trying to find, find Principiants? Austin: Principia’s right. Art: But the people from there are — Keith and Art: [cross] Principians? Austin: [cross] Oh, Principians? Yeah, Prin-ci-pians? Princi-pians? Princip — mmm. Art: Principites? Austin: Principians. Principians. Pricipi-ites. Art: Principi-ites. Austin: Principi-ates. Princi-pinos. Art: Principia residents. Austin: Yeah. You know, what I think that there is here, is a local satellite campus to the Endless Academy, that is, that has its focus on performance art. Uh, there is a sort of local campus for it here. And you’ll probably find some people from Principia there. Art: Um, I think I sort of like, just try to talk my way into a library setting. Austin: Sure. Are you, uh, ‘cause it is closed, the person who comes here is at the desk, and the person says, (as Library Attendant): Oh, unfortunately it is a closed library. It’s for students and faculty only. Do you have a registration number? Art (as Donnie): No? Austin (as Library Attendant): Yes, well, I’m, uh — Art: [cross] I was thinking of just, sorta like rattle off numbers. Austin (as Library Attendant): I’m sorry, you understand it is for the security, and the um, to maintain the studious atmosphere for those working here. And this is someone using the Sentence ‘Principia puts all things in their place’ on you. Or trying to do that. Art: [cross] Sure, sure. Austin: Do you have anything to counter? Art (as Donnie): No, I understand, but the — I’m not gonna get picked up for a little while, do you have like, a waiting area? A sitting room? Austin: Are you trying to counter the Sentence? Art: No, no, I’m just trying to say that my place is somewhere waiting for a ride. Austin (as Library Attendant): I see. Yes. Uh, you can wait right here. And like, gestures towards, there’s benches and stuff here to sit at right in the front. Art: Great. So, I am going to sit on the bench and then sort of leave the body behind, [Austin: Oh, sure.] like comic book character Negative Man from the Doom Patrol, who also walks around like a mummy and then has his soul self leave his body and do super heroic things. Austin: Love it. Great. Keith: That’s great. Can’t believe, that’s a one to one. Art: Yeah, I didn’t put, I was like, while we were talking I was like, wait a minute. Keith: I’m Negative Man! Art: [cross] I made Negative Man. Austin: [cross] I’m already — yeah, from first principles. Art: Yeah. Austin: Yeah, you know what, I think this is effectively countering that Sentence with, ‘I am always intangible,’ so I’m gonna go ahead and cross off ‘Principia puts all things in their place,’ it’s kind of a roundabout thing but a hundred percent, you’re getting what you want here. And yeah, you’re able to, at that point, disappear into the stacks of this library. Where primarily what you’re seeing is people reading and looking at books and stuff, but there are a number of studio spaces where people are working on their like, conceptual art and their performance art and stuff life that too. Art: Sure. And I suppose I’m looking for a paranormal section? Austin: Sure, yeah. You can find that, it’s on the top floor, right? Paranormal performance art, or y’know, the intersection between various forms of performance art and the paranormal. There is a whole section — Art: Yeah. That’s basically what I’m doing. Austin: A hundred percent is. There’s a whole bunch of books, actually there’s not a whole bunch of books. It’s probably a fairly small section here, probably because the larger paranormal library on Principia is where the bulk of that material is, whereas this is like, the stuff that leans the arts, and then like has the paranormal — you know, if it’s a book by a great paranormal expert it’s back in Principia, if it’s a book by a working artist it’s here, you know? So it’s a smaller collection here, but that stuff is here and I can imagine there being a person here who’s doing this sort of work. Maybe there’s somebody in a studio on this level who’s doing, who has a good idea for a performance art occultism piece? Who is doing some sort of summoning of the dead to produce, uh, that they are, hm. That’s too musical, what’s the performance art angle on this? Um, I think they’re simply summoning people to ask questions to, but instead of asking questions to them, they’re just sitting with them until they disappear. You know, they’re — Art: [cross] Oh, like “The Artist is Present.” Austin: Like “The Artist is Present,” except it’s like, the artist is copresent with the dead. What they’re effectively doing is like, casting… Keith: Wasting a ghost’s time. Austin: They’re basically wasting a ghost’s time. [Keith chuckles] You know, your classic D&D Speak With the Dead spell where it’s like, you can ask three questions or whatever. And it’s like, what if you did that and just sat with them? Keith: Sure. Austin: You know? Art: I would be so mad. [Keith laughs] Austin: I would be furious. I’m with you. So yeah, there’s someone doing that. Keith: This is like fishing. This is like catch and release fishing. Austin: Uh huh. I didn’t say they were a good person. Keith: No. No no no. Art: [cross] You didn’t even imply that. Austin: No, not even a little. Keith: No. Austin: What are you looking for here? And what is your, do you wanna use a Sentence here? Are you trying to, what are you up to? What are you trying to get from these series of actions? Art: I mean, as an aside I would like to use ‘I always force others to confront the truth’ to make these people realize that this is a horrible project and they should stop doing it. Austin: [cross] That’s very funny. Art: But I also sort of wanna use ‘I always force others to confront the truth’ on myself. Austin: Ooh! Interesting. Well — Art: I think there might be some truth here. Austin: Yeah. I do think ‘others’ is maybe brutal here, unfortunately. ‘Others’ is really a strong, you can’t use that Sentence on yourself. Art: Sure. Okay, well then first I’m gonna ruin this art project. Austin: Yeah. How do you do this? What are you doing? [cross] You’re using ‘I always force others to confront the truth.’ Art: I want them to realize that they’re wasting the time of dead people. You know, look into yourself and realize how much you would hate this. [cross] And then stop doing it. Austin: You simply tell them that they’re fucking up. Appearing in front of them in a surprising manner. Art: Or even just like, waiting and being the next, sort of cutting in line. Austin: [exhale] Oh yeah, that’s fun. Yeah, you become the next one. But you don’t sit in silence. You’re not compelled by their like, the rules of their summoning because you’ve just interjected yourself. Art: Right. Austin: I think they are… God, do I have a fucked up way to counter this? Let’s see. What is this person? Art: [chuckling] My student, the students are just like ‘I am always insufferable when dealing with my art,’ which would probably be a +1 because it has the limitation of… Austin: There is a really good, um, shitty teacher class, but I don’t know that I have a really shitty student class, unfortunately. So you might just get this one. I might just give this one. I have some other plans that are like, artsy ones. Yeah, I’m gonna say that this person, what is the sentence are you using again? ‘I always force others to confront the truth.’ Art: ‘I always force others to confront the truth.’ Austin: Ooh. Oh, and it’s two out of three on its marks, huh? So I could prime it if I do manage to… Ah, no. I think this person is surprised by you, and I think tries to put up an argument right? And is like, (as Student Medium): Well, as far as I can tell, the dead, y’know, um, uh, because the dead have infinite time, I can’t be accused of wasting any of theirs. Is the line of argument they’ve taken. Art (as Donnie): That’s simply, that’s not true though. The dead have things to do. For example, I’m in the library right now. Austin (as Student Medium): Right, because I summoned you here. Art (as Donnie): Well, did you? Austin (as Student Medium): Did I not? Have you not heeded my call? Art (as Donnie): Do I appear to be heeding your call? Austin (as Student Medium): You’re here in the studio. Art: [cross] I just wanna tell you, this is like the opening scene of Ghostbusters. Austin (as Student Medium): [cross] If a phone rings, and you pick it up, have you not answered the call? Art (as Donnie): I observed this happening and cut the line. Austin (as Student Medium): Well that doesn’t make any sense. By your own volition? No… Art (as Donnie): Okay, um, tell me to do something that I can do the opposite of. Austin (as Student Medium): [muttering] Something you can do the opposite of… I want you to, um, leave, and, uh, be very loud while doing it. Art (as Donnie): Is the opposite staying quietly, which would sort of be the usual thing… Austin: A big, stupid grin on their face as they think they’ve got you. Art (as Donnie): [mumbling] Or is it leaving…? [Keith chuckles] Art: Okay. I use spectral power to push this person out the window. [Ali gasps] Austin: Oh my god! [Keith laughs] Art: They’re gonna live, they’re gonna be fine. Austin: [cross] Are they? Ali: [cross] Yeah? Art: Yeah, I’m gonna — [Ali laughs] Austin: Also, it’s spectral power. Yeah, okay. Uh, well, they, you, they don’t have anything to counter you, and so I think that your fundamental point of making them confront the truth is, it works. They are going to reconsider their actions, though maybe not for exactly the reasons that we thought they might. I think you defenestrate a person and there’s lots of thoughts that go on. So, farewell. Art: So I can’t get the truth out of this area, [Austin: Well — ] um, is it possible to respond to a practical problem, I don’t know what I’m looking for in this library, with ritualistic means? Could I try to do some sort of like, I’m gonna say the phrase ‘book seance’ and trust that you can sort of get there. [Keith laughs] Austin: I think we could. I think we could. And that would get you your token back, yeah. Because — Art: Could I like, give some sort of, some sort of way that the book can present itself to me? Austin: Yeah, what’s this, what’s this, right. That the book could — I mean, you could do this with ‘I always wield a spectral power’ theoretically, but you could also force others, which is, you would be the truth in this sentence. ‘I always force others to confront the truth,’ the truth is you, and others is the spirits of the books or something. Art: Right, I think I’m gonna like, possess the bookshelf and sort of make it shake, and the idea is that the first, the person who comes here will take, to investigate, will take a book, and that that book is going to have the information I need. Austin: There’s a sort of like, uh, right. Like, the way that you would like, throw a book on the ground and whatever page it opens to is the page that has the solution type, uh… Art: Right, except with a… Austin: We’re back to, we’re back to, um, whatshisface again, David Lynch, we’re back to Kyle Maclachlan, Cooper doing Tibetan whatever throwing, yeah. Uh huh. I like this. Um, yeah, what is the book that falls? I think, I think we get the librarian who told you before that you weren’t allowed up here is gonna show up but presumably you hide from her as she comes back up. The first book that fell is a, um, is a book about, um, about trying to channel the creative energies of other places through your, through dance specifically. And it’s like, I, y’know, the section that you end up getting, so this is — I don’t think anyone’s opposing you, this is uncertain but you’ll succeed, and so you can take your token back here. I think this is fun. So make sure you mark that. You get a section in this book that’s like, the book is set up with a few chapters, and the first chapter is channelling places you know, channelling places you’ve been to, right? Channelling home while you’re away. Then it’s like, channeling places you’ve visited. Then it’s channeling places you’ve read about or have some secondary connection to. Then it’s like, channeling places that you’ve only heard about secondhand, then it’s like channeling imaginary — channeling past places. And then, channeling the imagined and other. And it’s that last section that is where the book landed, and opened up to, and that is the section that is calling to you here. There are dances you can do, and there are ways to move your body such that you are compelled to move with the rhythms of either times not yet real, so the future. Cultures imagined, you know, fictional places. You can bring them into reality through dance in some way. Or, vague alternate dimensions. A lot of attention in the book is given to the Drift, this sort of realm of emotion that we talked about before, the delivery men who came and gave the letters and boxes and stuff have been to the Drift. So there is some notion of other dimensions. And there’s a warning there, right, which is is that like, trying to draw on other dimensions through something as imprecise — dance’s beauty is in its imprecision and in its interpretive quality and in its flexibility, and that you should be a little careful when drawing on imagined and other dimensional places because something can get changed or lost in translation. But, there are ways to make those connections through artistic expression. I don’t know if that helps you, but that’s a thing you’ve learned here. I guess, let’s, lemme go even further. Sometimes that sort of, maybe there’s a particular story told about a troupe that was trying something in from either an imagined place or one of these other theorized kind of dimensions. And the thing came across, but it was out of sync in time with the people who tried to bring it over. And so, it would, by the time it could respond to the first thing they asked it, all those people would be dead. Just from old age. Like, it’s just on a different time scale than they are. And so there’s a sort of warning that like, yes, you could summon, you can summon beings from other worlds via dance, but there’s so many things that could go wrong in any sort of ritual already around this, specifically around feelings of, when feelings of doubt or feelings of, um, when feelings get involved. Basically, you know what I mean? This is someone who is like, dancing is, occult dancing is at its best when you’re trying to capture the spirit of a place you know really well, and you wanna give everybody who’s watching you, you wanna make them smell the first night of spring on your home planet. Like, that’s the type of stuff this book is teaching you how to do. Right? It’s really easy to do it when it’s the spring on the first night of your home planet, and if you get it a little wrong, who cares, it’s fine. But when you’re trying to summon beings from other worlds it gets real fuckin’ tricky and you have to do it perfectly, otherwise there can be some weird knock on effects, you know? Art: Sure. Okay, okay. Austin: You know? Learning some cosmological things here. Art: On an ethical level, and this is for everyone, can I take this book? Austin: Sure. That’s your book now. Art: Okay. Just, it’s a library, so. Keith: Yeah, that’s part of what a library is. Art: Well, the library’s not a place where you can steal books. Keith: They let you take them out, they just ask that you bring them back. Austin: Mm. Art: Alright. Austin: Yeah, I just assumed you’d bring it back when you’re done with it, obviously. Art: [cross] Yeah I mean, I’ll do my best. Keith: Right. There’s no punishment for taking a book until you come back. So if you never come back, there’s no punishment. Austin: Incredible. Art: I’m gonna sneak it into the mummy suit. And then just sort of stand up and walk out. Austin (as Library Attendant): Have a good one. Art (as Donnie): You too. Sorry I couldn’t be helped by you. [Keith laughs] Austin (as Library Attendant): Yes… Wellaway and Mother Hen Hye [1:32:02] Austin: Alright, where are we? Wellaway? Keith: Hi. Austin: You said you were not too bothered by going to get checked in or anything like that, huh? Keith: Nah. Austin: Okay. What are you doing instead? What are you doing with your free day? Keith: I was hanging out with Hye and doing ship stuff. Austin: Yeah I mean, the ship is gonna be taken care of in the spa, you don’t have to stick around for that. I mean, you could stay and watch I guess. Ali: It’s funny because I, my follow up thing if I had more daytime was to be like — Austin: Which you can totally have. Ali: Um, was to like, be trying to nervously mother hen you about your performance. [laughs] Austin: Ooh, incredible, please let’s get some of that. Ali: I think there’s some anxiety of like, oh I hope the ship is doing well, and I think it’s all being put in your direction in terms of being like, (as Hye): Well, do you know how many minutes you have, and do you feel good about what you’re doing, and… [laughs] Keith (as Wellaway): Uh, yeah. I mean, sure, I mean, no, but yeah. Ali (as Hye): Well, you must need these things to be prepared. Keith (as Wellaway): Yeah, I — Ali (as Hye): Or is it more about the moment, perhaps you wouldn’t be able to know the mood of your performance until you know where the moons are lying? Keith (as Wellaway): I don’t think of it in moon terms, but I think that’s basically right. Ali (as Hye): Well I think you would — you don’t think that you think about it in moon terms. [wheeze] Austin: Wow. Keith (as Wellaway): You’re saying I think it about it in moon terms even if I don’t think I think about it in moon terms? Ali (as Hye): I think that these things have an effect. Keith (as Wellaway): Sure, I mean, I believe in that. I’ve seen it. I have to believe that. Ali (as Hye): I appreciate that. Austin: I wanna just paint a very funny picture, as you’re having this conversation as you down the street, behind you in the distance there are these two giant wooden, like, figures, like figurines that are doing like a, um, I’m referencing a particular thing. Have you ever seen those little wooden toys that have like, fake swords and their heads are made of balloons? They’re like, puppets that you can fight with? Art: [cross] Yeah, uh huh. Yeah. Keith: [cross] Um, maybe. Ali: [cross] No. Keith: That sounds slightly familiar. Ali: The balloons thing threw me off. Austin: Okay. Well — Art: It’s like a little, it’s like Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots, kind of. Austin: Found it. Yes, yeah yeah yeah. This is happening and it’s gigantic behind you. If you do a search for Block ‘Em Pop ‘Em Wood Samurai. Ali: I see… Keith: Yep, yeah, I’ve seen these, yeah. Austin: These are huge and they’re like, standing on floating platforms below the city. And it’s like, two people are doing this down, like, the street from you as you’re mother henning Wellaway, walking around on Dokine is just like this. Just giant weird conceptual interactive weird things are happening all around you all the time. It’s very Neo Yokio-coded I think here, I think it’s very like, what’s the big spectacular thing in the background, it’s kind of hard to understand why it’s there. There’s music playing that kind of like comes and goes the way like, a smell in the city in the summer will. Where like, oh you smell food down that next street except in this case it’s a wave of music that passes through you and keeps moving. Y’know like, okay, was that playing from an invisible car that just drove by? Like, what’s going on? The sensory experience of being at this place is just very strange, and then at the very edge of your kind of experience is this very slight, like, the very edge of your lips are a little numb. The very tips of your fingers are a little numb from the lowkey constant corrosion of the air, you know? Keith: Yeah. Austin: I wanna paint the picture a little bit as we’re walking around talking. Keith (as Wellaway): I mean, part of me, I just wanna feel it out. Ali (as Hye): Feel out the audience, or feel out the situation? Keith (as Wellaway): I guess both. I mean, the audience is the situation in a way. Ali (as Hye): Well what’s your desired outcome? Austin: What’s your dramatic intent? Keith (as Wellaway): Laughs. Laughter. Ali (as Hye): Laughter. I see. Well, what do you hope to achieve with that laughter? Is it admiration, is it respect? Keith (as Wellaway): Um, no, it’s more that I just wanna do a good job. Ali (as Hye): I see, I see. Keith (as Wellaway): I mean, respect is good. Ali (as Hye): You know Wellaway, I find it very admirable that you consider your own pride first. You have a passion for your profession, and I, I like that. [laughs] I admire it, I am complimenting you. Keith (as Wellaway): Okay. I felt that. It’s the moons, the moons make you this way. Ali (as Hye): Yes, yes, well yes! Yes. I don’t want to speak too, uh surely — Keith (as Wellaway): Yes you do. Ali (as Hye): [chuckles] — Too concretely about what’s in your future, but we both know that there’s a great bit on your shoulders. Keith (as Wellaway): A great bed? Ali (as Hye): A great bit! A great bit — [laughs] Keith (as Wellaway): Oh, bit, a great bit. Sure. Ali (as Hye): And not like those bits you talk about, I mean like, a lot of responsibility, and — [wheeze] Keith (as Wellaway): Right. There’s not a gag. Ali (as Hye): No, there’s a, there’s a sense of history about you, Wellaway. Keith (as Wellaway): A sense of history? Ali (as Hye): Yes, I believe your future will be something people talk about. Keith (as Wellaway): My future will be history… Ali (as Hye): So you should do a good job tomorrow! Are you sure you don’t want to practice? Keith (as Wellaway): Okay. Ali (as Hye): What if we found, like, a practice run? There’s crowds all along. Keith (as Wellaway): A practice run? Ali (as Hye): Yeah like a little, like a open mic night. Do I know what an open mic night is? I don’t know. [laughs] Austin: Yeah, of course you do, yeah yeah yeah. Keith: [cross] Yeah, of course. On Dokine, every night is open mic night. Austin: [cross] You’re from the most vulgar of these four planets in a way that like, yeah, I think. You know what I mean? Keith: They have open fight night. Austin: Yeah, exactly. Keith: [chuckling] On Crux. Austin: On Crux, yeah. [Ali laughs] God, open fight night, love that. [Keith laughs] Ali: Oh my god… Austin: Adding it as a Moon Sentence to the Crux, ‘open fight night always draws a crowd.’ There we go. Added. That’s on my sheet, I should add it to yours too. Okay. So yeah, there’s open mic nights here, for sure. Ali: I mean it’s up to you to take the suggestion, I just thought it would be funny. [laughs] Keith (as Wellaway): I’m concerned about having to do whatever the performance is twice. And that that would be too difficult to do. Ali (as Hye): Well, I’m not an entertainer. I just thought… Well, I am some — well no — Keith (as Wellaway): You are an entertainer! Ali (as Hye): No, but I work alongside the fates. I just have to… my human role in that is to add some flourish. Keith (as Wellaway): Yeah, I don’t think there’s anybody in the circus that isn’t an entertainer. Even Kenneth. Ali (as Hye): Oh, well, yeah. I mean, that’s joy in a different… is food entertaining? Keith (as Wellaway): Well, but, y’know, bringing people into the line. Ali (as Hye): Well, yes. Keith (as Wellaway): Y’know, that’s… Ali (as Hye): It’s true… Keith (as Wellaway): Calling out to the crowd. Tossing the meats! He tosses the meats. Ali (as Hye): There’s performance in all things, isn’t there? I’m gonna write this down. [laughs] Keith (as Wellaway): What are you, Candide? Austin: Wow, yeah! You picked up the Candide — Keith: You self-Candided! Austin: [cross] You self-Candided, you did. We don’t have radios, right? We talked about this? We just have your cards that are like, hey. Keith: Yeah, the GPS cards? Austin: Oh no wait, and the shell. Keith: [cross] And the shell. Ali: Wait, wasn’t the shell extremely local? Austin: Well it was extremely — Keith: It’s one-way. Austin: It’s one-way, it’s central. It’s from the train. Keith: There’s a transmitter shell and, y’know, dozens of receiver shells. Ali: [cross] I thought they were on loan form the radio? From the, I guess we kept them? Austin: Yeah, y’all fuckin’ left with those. Ali: [laughing] Okay! Austin: I don’t know where you got them from exactly, but yeah you left with that thing. Ali: The like, tropical hotel base gave it to us. Austin: Oh you’re right, because they were conch shells specifically, you’re right. Ali: Yeah. Austin: I think Krinsky kept those. I don’t think Krinsky was in a rush to hand those back before escaping the deadly Empest. Ali: Okay. And if they still work — Austin: Who, by the way, seem to be staying the other side of the moon. So maybe it’ll be fine, maybe they just won’t be an issue for the rest of the season. Who could say. Keith: I’m bankin’ on it. Ali (as Hye): Wellaway, perhaps I should do a reading for you! Keith (as Wellaway): Oh, yeah sure! I’ll get readed. Ali (as Hye): [laughs] I hope you’ll find this fruitful. There’s nothing to roll, so I don’t — [laughs] Austin: Well, you could, I mean there’s — Keith: Unless I’m opposing it. Austin: Anyone, listen. It doesn’t have to be, you know? What is your intention? A lot of people could theoretically oppose. Ali: I… Austin: Are you just doing this in the street? Have you found a little table to sit down at? Ali: Yeah, maybe we stopped at an actual like, snack place. Austin: Totally. Ali: And we’re like, sitting down at a little table with an umbrella over it and one of us has like, a space iced coffee [Keith: Classic.] and one of us has like, a little pastry. Austin: Oh, delicious. [Ali chuckles] Who has which, I need to know who has which. Keith: Oh, um. I guess I would have the pastry, I think. Ali: Okay, yeah. And I have the, there’s like a purple liquid and like a foam on top, and then some sort of dust on top that’s a different color, and like — Austin: It’s galaxy flavored. Ali: Yeah, uh huh. Uh huh. Disneyland would put this in the Galaxy’s Edge — [chuckles] Austin: Oh for sure. Ali: — menu, is what I’m… Keith: What does galaxy taste like? Ali: Sweet. Sweeter than it should. Austin: Sweeter than it should. That’s exactly right. Keith: Sweeter than it should. Ali: Yeah. Keith: Sounds like every iced coffee. Ali: Uh huh! [laughs] Art: Oh my god Keith, later I gotta tell you about an iced coffee. Keith: Wow. Keith: Okay! [laughs] Ali: Um, yeah. But if I have to invoke a Class Sentence here, I would like to read the future in the stars. Austin: And your intention is to predict an accurate future about how this is gonna go for Wellaway. Ali: Mhm. Austin: How the show is gonna go. Ali: Right, if I could boil down the intention, less from like, how is it gonna go, because I would like the narrative space to be there for Keith. I think in the tarot way of like, sometimes a reading can give you a sense of what you should anticipate and work around it? Instead of being like, this is gonna go well. Like, y’know, there’s a man and a sense of anxiety and this card about, you know. Keith: I mean hey, I’ll give you a free opportunity right now to not invent an obstacle for me. [Ali laughs] Austin: Well… [Keith laughs] Ali: Noted. Austin: I do think something is, I do think I’m going to try to counter this. Ali: Okay! Austin: So you’re using ‘I always reveal the truth?’ No wait, that’s Keith’s. You’re using ‘I always know how to ritually summon the power of the moons?’ Ali: No, ‘I always read the future in the stars.’ Austin: [mumbles] ALways read the future in the stars. I am going to counter that with ‘Dokine’s light always alters the obvious.’ Ali: Ooh! Keith: Ooh. Austin: You pull a spread, and you’re ready to read it, and you blink — So that’s the one I’m using, I guess let’s resolve whether one counters the other first. Are you spending a token? Ali: Um, I don’t have one. Keith: No token to spend. Austin: You don’t have a token, no, this is true. Ali: [cross] I guess I could — Austin: Though I think this is going to get you yours back. Keith: Yes, I was just about to say that. This totally — [cross] Austin: This is absolutely a magical means, trying ot resolve the mundane problem which is like, hyping your boy up. [Ali chuckles] You know? So you don’t have it to spend it, but you will get it form this. But you’re going to get countered by ‘Dokine’s light always alters the obvious.’ You draw the spread of cards, and something changes. You swear that it was card, you know, ABCD, and then it turned out to be card AB — you’re so sure you saw the fourth card you pulled was one thing and now it’s something different. And it’s like, the light just tricked you in a way that makes you unsure, and makes you feel like the first parts of what you’re going to say are right, and then the fourth part is wrong. That something unpredictable is going to happen, that like, let’s say that you’re drawing for today and the following three days. Right? Ali: Mhm. Austin: The length of the comedy festival. The final day has a surprise, or has something that’s — the final day is unpredictable, is one way to read this, I guess. So go ahead and strike out that Sentence and prime it. That’s your third… Ali: Oh, strike it out and prime it, yeah. Austin: Yeah, counter it for the scene, which we’ll see how long the scene goes but yeah, you won’t be able to use it for the rest of the scene. Ali: And is there any sort of boost to the bond here? How do those work? I guess I didn’t spend it, I didn’t use it. Austin: You didn’t spend it, yeah. That’s exactly right, yeah. Ali: [cross] That would be the Sentence I would have primed. Austin: You could use that instead if you wanted to, if that’s where you wanted to place that it would have still been a +0 Sentence that would have gotten a mark, which is — Ali: I see, okay yeah. Austin: At the very least, you have now nominated that as a really good Sentence to put a mark in at the end of the session, right? Ali: Okay. Keith: Right. Austin: As one that didn’t fail during play, you know? Keith: I have a question, this is a zero Reality Sentence, ‘I always read the future in the stars.’ If I had chosen to counter that, I guess it doesn’t — maybe it doesn’t make sense. If I had chosen to counter that with ‘I always reveal the truth’ on the grounds that like, I trust my truth more than I trust Ali’s fortune telling version of the truth, would that have blocked the planet Sentence from having been able to counter that? Because I would have won, and would have revealed my own truth. Austin: You would, it would, in both cases it would — no, the thing that would actually happen here is we would go into what is, what I guess I will quickly call PvP, where things do not resolve in exactly the same way. Keith: Okay. Austin: When two players want to oppose each other, it is not as simple as it is when a PC and an NPC want to. What would’ve happened is we both, huh. I’ll just summarize it really quick. You both would have secretly selected a means, you would’ve written it down, you would’ve shared it with me privately, including whether you were boosting the means with a token or not, then you would have, we would’ve revealed. And I believe — yes, if the chosen means are the same rank, there is no winner. At this moment, the conflict reaches a standstill, and any other actions between your characters would have to happen under different circumstances. Describe that exchange, and determine what your characters do from here. Neither of you gets the yes in that scenario. Keith: Okay. Austin: So no, it wouldn't — I mean, yes, it would have prevented it, but we would still end up in this very strange place where you would have not revealed the truth nor would Hye have been able to read the future in the stars. Keith: Right. Austin: Which is interesting, but we don’t do a lot of PC versus PC, it’s not PvP, it’s not player versus player. Very explicitly, there’s a bunch of text in the book about how it’s ([cross] Keith: It’s character versus character,) it is character versus character, and even more than that it is players working together to be like, ooh, wouldn’t it be cool if our two characters oppose each other in this moment, you know? Otherwise you probably shouldn’t be doing it at all. So. But good to think about that, Keith. I do think that’s a really good example of where that come up in the future, so let’s back pocket that for sure. But you could’ve boosted the token, and that would’ve done that for instance, right? But, yep. Keith: Right, yeah. Ali: Okay. That was fun. [chuckles] Austin: Yeah. So yeah, so wait, what do you reveal? What do you say, now seeing a spread that is hard to read, what do you tell Wellaway? Or it’s not that it’s hard to read, it’s that something seems to have changed out from under you before you could fully interpret it. Ali: Yeah, I mean, I don’t think that I attempt to hide that part of it. You know? Keith: So you tell me that this is a flawed reading? Ali: Well not that it’s flawed, I think what I say is like, the fates are uncertain around you. The fourth day in particular seems, um, as though it’ll be some sort of surprise? Some sort of unanticipated outcome? Austin: And as if to punctuate that, one of the other Sentences in Dokine is, ‘Dokine’s skies are always crowded.’ There are lots of other Vessels coming and going, lots of other ships, smaller scale shuttles arriving. I would say Dokine and the Crux are probably the two moons in the Quartet that get the most outside visitors. Because they’re kind of entertainment destinations. Keith: Yeah. Austin: But, even in terms of just inter-Quartet, or interquarternian travel, Dokine is really up there. So there’s lots of like, we’re really aircar-ing it here. We’re really Attack of the Clones, Fifth Element, Blade Runner-ing here in terms of there being lots of air travel, you know? Keith: I’ve been thinking of this place as sort of like a bright Nar Shaddaa. [Ali giggles] Wellaway Signs In [1:50:54] Austin: Yeah, that sounds right, that’s a really good touchstone. And there is a classic airship holding a big banner advertising the Wooden Potato Comedy Festival, and it says, you know, ‘Keynote performance, night one.’ And night one is someone name Cartier Buff. And then number two is Wellaway Piaster, night two, Wellaway Piaster. And it says ‘Night three, The Final Night.’ As if, as the name — Keith: The last night ever? Austin: That is the name of the performer. Keith: Oh, the name of the performer is The Final Night? Austin: [cross] Seems to be The Final Night. Keith: K-N-I-G-H-T? Austin: Just N-I-G-H-T. I know I’m resisting — it’s strange for me to resist the homophone, but in this case it’s just N-I-G-H-T. Keith: Scarier. Austin: You know who Cartier Buff is, you don’t know who The Final Night is. Keith: Did I know I was a keynote speaker? Austin: Yeah. Keith: Okay. [cross] I don’t remember that from the — Austin: [cross] You’re a keynote performer. You’re a keynote slash performance slash, you could give a talk. You could give a routine. Keith: Right. We talked about how this is sort of like TED. Austin: We did, yes. We did. It is TED for comedy, unfortunately. Keith: It’s TED for — well, TED is already TED for comedy. Austin: Is TED TED for comedy? I mean, TED’s very funny. Keith: The middle, the E in TED stands for entertainment. Austin: Entertainment, right, okay, right. That’s why you’re not allowed to get too mad at it. [cross] Even though it’s all bullshit. Keith: [cross] Reggie Watts did a TED? Austin: Is there more here, or have y’all wrapped the little… Keith: I think we, yeah. I think we wrapped. Ali: Mhm. Austin: Alright. I think that’s kind of the way the first, the night zero effectively goes, right? You’re able to hang out, you’re able to investigate more stuff, you’re able to do whatever you want here, but it sounds like we’ve done our big before-the-comedy-festival-begins stuff. And I think that that night the circus is of course also setting up for an opening. There’s like, limited night one because half of the, you know, there’s no strong man big bell that you hit because it’s getting fixed up, right? So there’s like a limited version of an evening show for the circus. But none of your stuff is there. Keith: Maybe if there’s a limited evening show, and it’s still night zero, maybe this is the time to go sign in quickly. I’ve seen my name on a ship, so I should tell them that I’m here. Austin: Yeah yeah yeah, totally. I mean that makes sense. You go and meet these people, what are these people like? What is the comedy scene, who’s running this place? Is it being run by comedians, is it being run by producers and promoters, what’s the vibe? Keith: It’s absolutely not being run by comedians. It’s definitely producers and promoters, you know, people, this is like in a high school sports movie or whatever and someone is like, oh there’s scouts here, you know? And there’s that extra, there’s that nervous, like, oh my god, there’s scouts here. That’s the only thing that I have cared about for four years of playing high school sports. It’s like that, but everybody goes to where the scouts live. Austin: Love this. Miserable vibes. Keith: Yeah. Austin: They welcome you in, and I think there are a bunch of people who are still getting signed in. It’s the end of the sign-in situation. You’re able to get a sense of the venue, which is also a really nice thing to do. There is, it’s kind of like a big central auditorium right in front of, right beyond the sign-in desk. That’s where everyone will go watch, but there’s also these kind of like two wings to the left and the right that have, the left hand wing — Keith: Can they be real wings? Austin: I think in this case they can be real wings. This building is like, in the middle of the street, and one of them goes onto the left wing and one of them goes onto the right wing, you know like the east wing and the west wing of the big butterfly of the city. So one of them I think is comedians who have little booths where they’re like, doing shtick. And like, it’s the scout thing, right? Or maybe it’s the various scouts have set up their little booths, scouts and promoters. And like, tomorrow, comedians are gonna come in and do the circuit, by which they mean go from booth to booth. Keith: Like, do your jokes, do your act in front of an audience of one scout? Austin: Of one scout, over and over. Keith: But that’s so inefficient. That’s hilarious. That’s evil! [laughs] Austin: [cross] It’s miserable, a hundred percent. Well, they wanna own the shtick, they don’t want anyone to see it. The jokes travel far here in Realis, you know? If someone wants to steal your joke, they can transmit it somewhere across the moons and have someone else doing your material by this time tomorrow seven hundred moons away, you know? Keith: Right. Austin: Then, the other side has to be really annoying. It’s like, arts and tech in comedy promotional, presented by Pepsi, you know what I mean? Keith: Yeah. Austin:The sort of like, how technology can change comedic performance for the better. You know, it’s holograms. You could have holograms signal to when your big laugh lines are gonna come. And every comedian is like, no. That’s not what I want. I don’t want an applause sign for my stand up special, that’s a nightmare. But that’s one of the things. There’s a bunch of these sorts of like, tech comedy inventions that are sponsored that are here. All underwritten by the Killead Consortium, of course, trying to worm its hands into every one of these moons in different ways. You don’t see any Killead people here, you just see that classic Killead Consortium, (Keith: Influence.) influence and funding signals, you know? Keith: And influencers. Austin: And influencers. Oh god. I will say, there is no thousand moon-wide social media in this version of Realis that you are living in. I can imagine someone else’s campaign has that, that is not the case here. And I think you are all better for it, so. Keith: Yeah. Austin: I will say that there is a… Keith: Is there a four moon — Austin: No — Keith: Is this a, the Facebook — do we have a-the Facebook? Austin: You don’t have a-the, I don’t think you have a-the Face — hm! [laughs] Keith: [laughs] Do you have a-the Facebook? Austin: [italian accent] Do you have a-the Facebook! Art: [even thicker italian accent] Do you have a-the Facebook? I’m Italian Mark Zuckerberg. Austin: Italian Mark Zuckerberg! Art: I eat-a the pasta, I steal the Hawaii. [Keith laughs] Austin: [groans] Oh, god. He looks so weird now! Ali: He looks so weird now. Keith: He looks so weird. He couldn't find a normal look. Austin: [cross] It’s insane! Keith: He went from one extremely odd look to another. Austin: He should’ve just been business guy weird. ‘Cause that’s — Keith: He looks like a quiet kid who in high school as a defense mechanism, got really into something like, oh fuck, who are the clowns? Austin: ICP. Keith: ICP. He got really into the Insane Clown Posse as a defense mechanism. Austin: [cross] As a defense mechanism, right. Keith: And started wearing big black shirts. [laughs] Austin: [groans] He looks so weird. There is a familiar sight in the distance, actually let me see if there’s a Sentence being used here worth knowing. “Cause there are people doing setup here, you know what I mean? And there’s that classic thing that happens at a convention, I don’t know how many conventions y’all have been to, where there’s just so many people moving around that it can actually be kind of easy to have people there who are like, are you from here? There’s no Sentence being used here, there’s nothing being used against you at this point. What I’m kind of doing is rewarding your ‘I always reveal the truth,’ this is kind of why I keep just saying you see people, is ‘cause like that’s just happening, right? I don’t need you to tell me you did that. Keith: Right. In the same way that Donnie moves around and kind of passively scares people without having to use a move. Austin: And the way that Candide is slipping in and out of scenes, right? Like this is just right now, at the scale, at the level of Reality the Sentences are, that’s how that’s working. You see someone you super didn’t expect to see off in the distance. In the main auditorium, where there are people setting up lighting and working on mic check and stuff like that, do you remember the weird Magistrate that Donnie scared, or tried to scare? Keith: Yeah, the coward. Austin: The coward, yeah. Magistrate Castagon is here. Like, in row three. And is going up and is like, talking to people and then holding up a photo, and then putting the photo away. Doing the Shenmue ‘do you know where I can find sailors?’ Keith: Right, yeah. Austin: And then putting it away. And you notice two things. One is, it is a hundred percent a head shot of you, right? Keith: Yeah. Austin: It is the head shot of you, like from the program. And then two, Castagon has like, a collar with a bunch of weird crystals in it. And it kind of works — Keith: Okay, he’s under, what’s the opposite of house — he’s on oust arrest. Where he has to go out and do this. Austin: Yes, it seems like maybe that’s the case. Yeah, I mean I think the last time that we saw him I talked about the Killead people like, bringing him in for questioning having dropped the ball or whatever, right? Not that he worked for them necessarily, he did not. He fucked off during all of that stuff and I think he ended up in their control. And so yeah, it does look like a leg bracelet except like, gothier, you know? Keith: Right. Austin: It is a choker collar with crystals in it, around his neck. Keith: I take out my notebook and I write down ‘oust arrest’ and I write down next to it ‘1000 points.’ Austin: [laughs] Nah, I — oust arrest, mwah, perfect, no notes. Also I love that everybody is developing a notebook culture. [Ali and Keith laugh] Everyone is taking notes, that’s how it should be over here in this version of Realis. So yeah, someone here is on the hunt for you. Be careful. Keith: Or I could choose to be not careful. Austin: That’s true. What do you do? Art: That’s a good point. Keith: Hmm… Art: I promised someone else I’d be on my worst behavior. Keith: I think that I should be careful. Austin: You should be careful, that’s fair. Yeah. Keith: Yeah. I would love to go and run up on this guy and be like, what’s going on, what do you want. But maybe I should sign into the job that I’m here to do. Austin: They sign you in, they say thank you. (as Festival Receptionist): Thank you Mr. Piaster, we’re so excited to see your material. You’ve come highly recommended. Um, you know, I’m not much, I’m not one for comedy really, but I really love when people are on stages. So I’m really excited for your bit. Keith (as Wellaway): Oh, you’re like a stagehead? Austin (as Festival Receptionist): I, heh — Keith (as Wellaway): Music. Austin (as Festival Receptionist): Well, not really music. Um, but I just — Keith (as Wellaway): Carpentry? Austin (as Festival Receptionist): You know, I haven’t seen anyone do carpentry on a stage, but I would try it? Keith (as Wellaway): Carpentry to make the stage. Austin (as Festival Receptionist): No… n-no. I want a done stage. Keith (as Wellaway): Me too, actually, for comedy. Austin (as Festival Receptionist): Is that important? Keith (as Wellaway): Yes. Austin (as Festival Receptionist): Makes sense. Anyway thank you so much, is there anything you need? We of course have the hotel room available for you, with the breakfast. Keith (as Wellaway): [cross] Oh, oh! Austin (as Festival Receptionist): Um, and we have the comedian special luncheon tomorrow, should we put you down for that? We weren’t sure… Keith (as Wellaway): Please, yeah, put me down for that, and can I pick up my key, or do they have my name at the desk? Austin (as Festival Receptionist): They have your name at the desk at the hotel, and for the luncheon tomorrow, do you want the chicken or the brief? Keith (as Wellaway): Remind me about the brief? Austin (as Festival Receptionist): It’s a quick lunch, is what it’s called. And so, there’s a little tiny bit of a bunch of different proteins. They’re called, they’re brief proteins, where you don’t ever know what it is. You go, ooh, what was that fla — and it’s gone. Keith (as Wellaway): And it’s gone. Sorry, and the lunch lasts as long as the chicken lunch, or I eat it quickly and then I leave? Austin (as Festival Receptionist): And then leave. But you get to show up and you get to say hey, everybody, I made it. And then — but we know you’re very busy as a keynote speaker, we wanna make sure you have the ability to stop in, say hello to everybody, and then get outta there. Keith (as Wellaway): Yeah, I’ll go with the chicken. Austin (as Festival Receptionist): Okay. Now that does mean we expect you to sit for at least seven to…twenty seven minutes. Art: That’s a huge range. Keith (as Wellaway): Actually, looking at my schedule, I think I can swing seven minutes. Austin (as Festival Receptionist): Perfect. Alright, I’ll put you down for the chicken. Austin: Guy in the distance, (as Castagon): [gruff] Have you seen this clown? You’ve not seen this clown, okay. Night two, yes, night two. I’ll come back on night two. Have you seen this clown? Excuse me, have you seen this clown? Okay, I’ll come back on night two. Keith: I’ll slink away. Austin: [chuckles] Okay, yeah. Keith: I will do a Scooby-Doo tiptoe, knees to the chest. Hands up. Austin: Or will you stay here doing shtick with this person, this receptionist who doesn’t like comedy long enough that the guy shows up looking for you? Yeah, you get out of there just fine. There’s a hotel across the street that you can stay at if you’d like to stay away from the rest of the crew. It’s a fancy hotel, they’re puttin’ you up, they’re doing the thing, you know? Keith: Yeah, yeah. Austin: And there’s like, a per diem, so you can get room service, you know? Keith: Wow. Or pocket that per diem. Austin: Or you can pocket that per diem. Keith: I’ve already got three loops. Austin: That’s true. Keith: And the treasure, but I don’t like to think about it as my treasure. It is my treasure, and I will use it as such, but I know that it will, you know, [cross] that’s not like a bank account. Austin: [cross] I mean we’ve already seen it come into — yeah, you know. In fact, I think, are you back at the ship, not the Orphan Vessel, but the train, Hye? Ali: Uh, yeah, yeah probably. Austin: I think you get a message from the spa that says that the Vessel would like your help to begin thinking of directions for a new name. Which is a collaborative experience for an Orphan Vessel, and Orphan Vessel likes to have its own name, generally. And I don’t know that the Jubilant Jewel is really doing it for this Orphan Vessel these days, you know? And it doesn’t know enough about the world right now, so it’s kind of like sent you a message to be like, hey can you think of some directions for me to start thinking of names? Thanks. You know? Ali: Okay. Austin: Just advice. An Orphan Vessel’s weird, because it’s kind of like a Pokémon in ways. Ali: Okay… Austin: Where you know like, the thing in the world of Pokémon where like, Pokémon love to fight! And I’m always like what the fuck are you talking about? Ali: Uh huh. Keith: Right. Austin: Like, an Orphan Vessel loves to fly around, it loves to carry stuff from place to place. And like Pokémon, has this strange sense of melancholy at its heart because they’re all descendents of these Grand Vessels which has since been eradicated or corrupted and they can never go home again and there’s this intrinsic kinship between them that they can’t anymore, but they kind of replace that kinship with the kinship they feel with their captains and commanders and their crew. And so they’re always trying to find that again. But that’s real, they do want that, and so this is it reaching out to be like, well, I don’t know if you’re my captain yet, but you can help me come up with a name, you know? So. Ali: Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. Interesting. Austin: Much to consider. Ali: Indeed. [Music outro - “Realis” by Jack de Quidt begins playing]